This one's a biggie, be careful. Sue looks like she's floating in the first panel, but I think that's to give the effect that she's separated from everyone else as she was the sole witness to Mike's "sacrifice" and stuff.
Lily's dialogue is also the worst ever, I wish I coulda changed it. She's meant to sound smart, but man does she sound kind of retarded here.
Also I can't draw hands carrying a body, aaaaa
Lucy is so clearly illogically dependent.
The last panel on page 18 was a freaken BITCH. First time ever doing that kind of perspective, I don't think I nailed it.. but hopefully it makes sense!
There's many more flaws I can see, but I really should save it all up for the commentary when this is posted on the webpage XD See you Tuesday.
Pages 1-4: [link]
Pages 5-10: [link]
Pages 11-18: What you see now.
Pages 19- 24: [link]
Pages 25 - 28: [link]